My SOT experience

I'm feeling a bittersweet loss after SOT. Its been a tiring, trying, challenging, and tiring (yes tiring again) 5 months of SOT. I can remember the beginning just as if it happened yesterday, but now, its over.

Now that I've graduated, I found that I suddenly don't have....

Stress and intensive use of time for the past 5 months. There was never a moment I was "free". I was busy reading the assignment books, or reading the bible, or giving tuition, or catching up on sleep, or completing my FYP, or journeying to give tuition, or doing my usher stuff, etc. I only remembered I had only One saturday when I had completely no tuition to do and I could do stuff that ministered to me (ie sleeping). Today, other than tuition, I can actually afford to take an evening nap and stay up till 4am (no need to wake up at 7 to get to SOT!)

I am also reeling because...

Suddenly, I don' t need to fulfill the other requirements of SOT anymore.. makeup for girls! Rather prophetically, my packet of makeup remover tissues was used up yesterday. I don't need to wear anymore makeup if I don't want to. But I guess, I think I will still continue wearing makeup when going to church. These 5 months have changed me to see that I can actually look very much better when I wear makeup, and improved my self confidence too.

I miss.....

The fellowship of the saints. We have an indian pastor in our team. On the last school day, we went out for a time of fellowship, and he shared with us and preached to us his revelations from the Word of God. I would so dearly miss his simple sharing and preaching to us! 3Ps and 3Rs of the Samaritan woman, 3Ps of Joseph's life, etc. We also have a worship leader in our team. He had sung before crowds of 100 000 before. Unthinkable. Yet he's like one of the cutest, nicest, humblest guys in our team, with a great smile! I'll miss his singing. I'll miss the early morning smses from concerned team mates, "hey have you reached?" and I'll miss the good natured ribbing of a certain concerned married teammate, "how come no guys chase you?!", "i'm rooting for you!", "the guys must be blind!".

I miss.....

The bible studies, every day we're filled with the Word of God and learnt some new things. I've amazingly completed the whole course of bible studies, without sleeping for the large part of it due to an amazing discovery of super sour sweets. Considering that sometimes I didn't study for exams because of lack of time, or I was so tired that I just want to complete the exam paper so that I could spend the remaining time sleeping, I passed everything with flying rainbow colours, 9As, 3Bs, that's a crazily good result.

I miss.....

The great books that are part of our syllabus that are so addictive and inspiring etc. I enjoyed the books that are part of our assignments, most of the time it is more of an enjoyment than chore-ish work to read them.

I miss.....

The immense spiritual warfare and pressure upon me during mission trip. 23 people were supposed to come, led by a capable leader while I was just a helper. Then the devil struck, and just like that, 5 people, including the leader, could not go on with us. The baton was thrown to me, and I had to assume the responsibility of leadership. It was actually leadership for 1 day (the other day was play-day), but the load was tough on me, because I was reeling from past leadership scars and problems, and it just seems that all the decisions I made didn't get through etc. really tough. But here I am, I survived to tell the story. And I still want to go for more mission trips!

Last but not least, I'll miss the special touch of God in the place, for the n-th time we consecrate our lives and give our lives fully unto the Lord, but every time that happens, tears of the touch of God flow and flow. We can never give enough of our lives to our God who gave His life for us.

As a chapter ends, a new chapter unfolds. Thank you all, my dear cg, for all your support and love. I'm looking forward to living out the Word that has been invested in our lives these 5 months, a life that reflects the glorious God that made all these possible. Praise God! Thank God for what He has done!